Talking to Your Parent About Assisted Living

Many adult children of elderly parents complain that their parents do not listen to their advice.  While that may be true, and if you feel like you are one of those, it may have something to do with your methods and delivery.  

To start with no matter how old our parents are, many of them still think of us as kids.  After all to them it wasn’t that long ago they were telling us what to do.  That being said, there are a few tips from the experts to help us talk to our parents more effectively regarding sensitive subjects including their need for more help with daily living.

While generally it is best to not give unsolicited advice to a parent, there are times when it may be necessary.  This includes a fear that they are putting themselves in harm’s way by not getting the care they need to ensure their safety and wellbeing.  

To start the “conversation” the first thing you want to do is to pick your time and place.  Don’t try to broach big problems at a family gathering or when you know your parent is tired or stressed.  Once you do, calmly tell them your concerns, give them the time to respond, and make sure you really listen.  Ask thoughtful questions and see if they have a better solution.  

Refrain from sounding condescending or argumentative, and remember you want to be supportive not controlling.  In fact, you may find your parent had already come to the same conclusion you had regarding their care but are struggling with the idea of giving up some of their independence.   

At MorningStar of Happy Valley, an assisted living and memory care community in Happy Valley, OR, we understand some of the angst that goes into making these types of lifestyle changes. We encourage you to read the Decision Guide on our website to help your family through the process.  You may also contact us to request a copy of “Senior Life: How to have the Best Conversation Ever with Your Elder Parent,” which offers an explanation of the relational and psychological constructs of aging and legacy. 

MorningStar of Happy Valley represents the finest in assisted living and memory care with our distinct mission statement – “to honor, to value, to invest.”  With a foundation built on honoring God, valuing all seniors and selecting staff with a felt calling to serve, we create a true home for residents within a beautiful setting. Please contact us to learn more about the finest senior living community in Happy Valley, OR.